Of Movie Nights and Pillow Fights
by Afifa
Summary: They are watching a movie together when they make an unexpected discovery - life altering for Elizabeth, hilarious for Darcy and shocking for both.


**Author's Note:** This was something which I wrote back in June or so my notebook says. I was going through it and realised I never posted the oneshot. Well, here you are. Enjoy.

P.S. Super lame title, which even rhymes, but I haven't slept all night and I want this up now or it will take me another five months to post it.

* * *

**Of Movie Nights and Pillow Fights**

'Oh, Lord. Are they for real?' she says, annoyance evident in her voice.

I turn from the movie we had just started watching on the flat screen and face her. 'What?' I ask, amused at seeing her nose wrinkled in distaste.

She gestures wildly in the direction of the television. 'Them. The movie. Who even says stuff like that? How is crap like this even released for the public to see?'

I stifle the urge to chuckle. 'You do not approve?'

'NO!' she says, her voice loud. 'No.' She calms down.

'Then why watch it?' I question though I am aware that this will only serve to annoy her but that is the whole point. 'And, why, while we are at it,' I add wryly, 'force me to watch it?'

She sighs. 'I got this DVD from Jane's stash. I needed something new to watch, something which would end within two hours. I cannot get into a new TV show with the thesis due in just two weeks. And I needed some company that is why you are here.'

I laugh and am rewarded with a punch on my arm. Her obsession for anything, particularly anything fictional, is well known to me. Heck, after all these years, it is a surprise – a _good _surprise – that this quirk of hers has not rubbed off all over me.

'This movie belongs to Jane. What did you seriously expect?'

She punches me again. Honestly. This woman. I will be covered with bruises tomorrow morning. And not even those incurred while being engaged in some, er, vigorous activities. I grin at my thought.

Her eyebrows rise. 'Do not go all perverted on me,' she warns and waves her hand as I start to reply. 'No, don't even try to deny. I know you.'

I give up. She is right, she knows me too well. It is such a pain sometimes - scratch that - most of the times.

'But,' she continues, 'I will let that go. And.' Her eyes narrow. 'I will let go of the slight towards my favourite sister, but just this once, mind.'

'You know I am right. In fact, you were the one who started complaining about the movie.' I turn towards the screen and laugh. The onscreen couple are busy in quite an intense – and unusual – lovemaking scene.

She turns and looks, too. And scoffs. Yes, scoffs. Any normal woman would blush. But, no, not her. But then we have been through too much to be embarrassed by such situations.

'How predictable. It is like sending the world a message that corny words are the key to getting into a woman's pants.'

I do not reply but continue staring at the screen. 'At least he is getting some,' I mutter.

Unfortunately, she hears me. 'What? You are not getting any?' She smirks.

I finally turn to her. 'Yes. I have been celibate since -.' I stop. 'You do not need to know.'

'Tell me, tell me, tell me,' she whines. Really. It is like she is in a perpetual high.

'Why? Are you offering?'

'Ew, no.' She hits me with a pillow. 'I'm just curious. You without a woman on your feet. However did that happen?'

'That is a very nice imagery but not true,' I say, smiling. 'They are not on my feet but hanging around my arms and it gets tiring after some time, you know?'

She opens her mouth but I cut her off. 'Oh, right. My bad. You wouldn't know.' I smirk.

Her eyes flash. 'For your information –'

I interrupt her again. 'No, no. Please. Have pity on me and spare me the details. This is movie night, not a girl's slumber party.'

She shrugs and grins. 'Suit yourself,' she says and turns her attention back to the movie. 'You have got to be fucking kidding me,' she screams and slumps back to the couch, placing a pillow on her face as if trying to suffocate herself.

I turn to see what caused this reaction and – _LORD!_ (yes, that did rub off her and on me). That was some seriously – oh, wait. What? How do you even do that? Oh, man. I squirm at my place. No, this is not the time. Control your body, dammit.

I get up and purposely walk to the coffee table, grabbing the remote from it. I hear some moans and press the mute button before forwarding the video. I stop and play after every few minutes but they are still at it. I pause for a second and salute their stamina. And flexibility. Really. How did they even accomplish doing that position? Shrugging, I forward and continue till another thought strikes me. Yes, I grin as I reach the ending credits. _No fucking way_.

'_No fucking way.'_ She is up. I walk to her, grinning madly. 'You have more experience in this, I'm sure. Tell me that was not porn.' Her eyes seem to be begging me to say that what she thought was wrong. Now this was a first.

'Wellll,' I stretch the l and pause. I mean, really, what if I had come across that in Gia's collection. I grimace. No, no, no. That was not happening. I make up my mind to check through her movie collection just in case. But for now I had to tease her.

'I am surprised. I did not know that Jane had it in her.'

She winces. 'So this, you know –' She stops.

This is amusing really. The one person who never hesitates to voice an opinion no matter who she is talking to is actually uncomfortable. 'Porn? Yes,' I confirm.

She sinks back down on the couch.

'Your sister has certain fantasies it seems. Maybe I should show this to Charles.'

Her shoulder straightens and she looks relieved. 'Yes, of course. This belongs to Charles and not my sister. Right.' She looks like she is trying to convince herself.

'But it came from her supply,' I argue, trying to rile her up.

'No, no. They live together. It must have gotten mixed up,' she insists. 'I should have a talk with Charles to take care of his things.'

I sit down and grasp her shoulders. 'Why is it so hard to believe that this belongs to Jane?'

'Because.' She seems to be struggling with words – another first. 'It's Jane!' she finally exclaims as if that explains it all. And, well, it actually does.

'Hey!' I take hold of her chin, lifting her face up so her eyes meet mine. 'It's fine. Jane's not perfect, okay? I'm actually glad you came across this. Shows her human side.' She continues to look bewildered so I add, 'I must talk to Charles, he is obviously not taking care of her … needs properly.' I wince but then grin once I see her smiling.

'Dude. Please. She is my sister and I have known Charles since forever.' She laughs and then sighs, places her head on my shoulder. I pull her closer. Her breathing starts to slow down and I assume that she is asleep so I start stroking her hair. This feels so nice. I am just about to doze off when I hear her speak. My hands still and I am about to apologise when she chides me.

'Hey, don't stop. That is so relaxing.'

I smile and continue, glad she is not angry.

'Thanks. But you didn't answer me.' She opens her eyes and looks at me.

'I'm sorry, what did you say?' I really was not paying attention. I was otherwise occupied

She frowns. 'I said I should gift Jane _Kama Sutra _for Christmas.' She grins, her eyes sparking with mischief.

I cannot help but laugh. 'That would be … perfect.' I gasp between breaths. 'That is a fantastic idea.'

'Well, duh.'

I raise an eyebrow. 'Really? Duh? How old are you?'

'Made you say it, too, didn't I?' She grins.

'That is not the same thing,' I argue.

'It is.'

'No, it isn't.'

'Yes, it is.'

'No.'

'Yes.'

'No.'

'Really? Yes, no, yes, no. How old are you?' she uses her words against me and gets off her couch squealing as I start to tickle her.

'Oh, now you are in trouble,' she says as she picks up a pillow.

I look at the bangs on her forehead, the grin on her face showing off her teeth, one of which is just slightly crooked, the shining eyes and my heartbeat quickens. She warns me I'm in trouble. I already know I'm in trouble.

Shaking my head, I smile, pick up a bottle of water and start chasing her.

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**Author's Notes:** So typing this up, it occurred to me that I could have a sequel for this. I don't know for sure though, my schedule is pretty hectic right now. University is a pain in the ass. Well, not that but the work. But, would a follow up be appreciated?

Anyway, thanks for reading and please do leave a review. :)

-Afifa


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